The time is almost here.....
It's 3am on Sunday morning and I'm realizing the time is almost here......
Later today we will head up to Nashville, for the trip I have been dreading. This time we wont go and come right back home, we will stay for Judson's surgery. We will come home with a newly shapen head on our Juddy Buddy, with room for his brain to grow!! I'm trying to be tough, I'm trying to be strong....I don't want to show my girls that I am afraid, I don't want to show people in my family I am afraid, and I definitely don't want to show those around me I am afraid. The afraid feeling is very superficial though. It's my "mama heart" that doesn't want to imagine handing my baby over to surgeons, or to imagine them cutting open his head. It's being afraid that I won't see my same little boy anymore, after the whole shape of his head is changed. Will the shape of his precious eyes change?? Will it be like looking at a different child? How will he recover, how long in the hospital, will i be able to manage taking care of him?? Questions of uncertainty and unknowing..
BUT......
THAT'S when my Lord shows up!!! That's when HE sweeps in with HIS big loving arms and holds me tight. That's when HE whispers sweet peace. Thats when I hear scriptures, hear songs, hear words of encouragement that have been given over the past few months. That's when I remember that I can't give the enemy a victory. That's when the Lord gives strength to stand tall in my storm....and THAT'S when peace that passeth all understanding comes rolling in!!! I'm glad I serve a God that is right on time, that has the right amount of grace I need for each little moment!
As I was talking to my best friend earlier, she reminded me....the Lord isn't going to give me enough grace for the whole week ahead of me, right NOW. But when I wake up Tuesday morning, it will be enough for Tuesday. When I wake up Wednesday morning, it will be enough for Wednesday!! His mercies are new everyday....and are just what we need!!
Later today we will head up to Nashville, for the trip I have been dreading. This time we wont go and come right back home, we will stay for Judson's surgery. We will come home with a newly shapen head on our Juddy Buddy, with room for his brain to grow!! I'm trying to be tough, I'm trying to be strong....I don't want to show my girls that I am afraid, I don't want to show people in my family I am afraid, and I definitely don't want to show those around me I am afraid. The afraid feeling is very superficial though. It's my "mama heart" that doesn't want to imagine handing my baby over to surgeons, or to imagine them cutting open his head. It's being afraid that I won't see my same little boy anymore, after the whole shape of his head is changed. Will the shape of his precious eyes change?? Will it be like looking at a different child? How will he recover, how long in the hospital, will i be able to manage taking care of him?? Questions of uncertainty and unknowing..
BUT......
THAT'S when my Lord shows up!!! That's when HE sweeps in with HIS big loving arms and holds me tight. That's when HE whispers sweet peace. Thats when I hear scriptures, hear songs, hear words of encouragement that have been given over the past few months. That's when I remember that I can't give the enemy a victory. That's when the Lord gives strength to stand tall in my storm....and THAT'S when peace that passeth all understanding comes rolling in!!! I'm glad I serve a God that is right on time, that has the right amount of grace I need for each little moment!
As I was talking to my best friend earlier, she reminded me....the Lord isn't going to give me enough grace for the whole week ahead of me, right NOW. But when I wake up Tuesday morning, it will be enough for Tuesday. When I wake up Wednesday morning, it will be enough for Wednesday!! His mercies are new everyday....and are just what we need!!
Lamentations 3:22
“It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.”
He is promising!! He tells us that we will not be consumed!!! He never fails! He's never late! He's never let me down, so why would He start today!?
I just want to praise His name! I just want to thank Him for his mercy and His love, for his comfort and guidance, and for HIS unending peace. I might have started off the post at 3am, with a fearful heart.....but thank God, i can end it at 330am with renewed strength that does not come from within myself.
..it only comes from the Lord!!!
" I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord....."
Psalm 121:1-2
So very true!!! Praying for you guys!! God is in control. We serve a great Saviour!
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